There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Among them:
Different people have different opinions of what is vulgar or obscene. However, the following verses would likely be considered vulgar or obscene, were they in any setting other than the Bible.
The Lord is going to punish David for his sin by taking his wives and causing his neighbor to fuck them in public. The way God dishes out punishment is really telling of his delusional frame of mind. He is mad at David, instead of having an elephant hump him, he takes it out on David’s women. The wives or the neighbor didn’t do any wrong to God. What if the women were nymphomaniacs? Maybe the neighbor could come back with an excuse like “I did not have sexual relationship with these women.”
2 Samuel 12:11 Thus saith the LORD, Behold, I will raise up evil against thee out of thine own house, and I will take thy wives before thine eyes, and give them unto thy neighbour, and he shall lie with thy wives in the sight of this sun.12 For thou didst it secretly: but I will do this thing before all Israel, and before the sun.