There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Among them:
If you like to share smut with your family, the bible is for you. If you enjoy adult degrading material for your children, let it be known that the Lord talks sweeter than a $20 whore. If you get a rise from porn, XXX-rated material, golden showers, hard-core pornography, indecent and obscene materials, sexually explicit stories, look no further than the holy bible, a book so good that a few idiots decided to violate the US Constitution by displaying it in the halls of public buildings.
“Behold, I am coming like a thief. Blessed is the one who remains awake and clothed, so that he will not go naked and let his shame be exposed.”
Revelation 16:15 Behold, I come as a thief. Blessed is he that watcheth, and keepeth his garments, lest he walk naked, and they see his shame.