Biblical stupidity part 754

There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Among them:

If you get a rise from nonsense, look no further than the holy bible, a book so good that a few idiots decided to violate the US Constitution by displaying it in the halls of public buildings.
Genesis 38:27 And it came to pass in the time of her travail, that, behold, twins were in her womb.28 And it came to pass, when she travailed, that the one put out his hand: and the midwife took and bound upon his hand a scarlet thread, saying, This came out first.29 And it came to pass, as he drew back his hand, that, behold, his brother came out: and she said, How hast thou broken forth? this breach be upon thee: therefore his name was called Pharez.

Do you remember the story of Tamar? God murdered her 2 husbands (brothers Er and Onan) and she got knocked up by Judah, her father-in-law. Well she is in the delivery room ready to evict a set of twins. One baby puts out his hand and the midwife binds it with a scarlet ribbon to identify him as the firstborn. But he draws back his hand, and his brother is born first, thereby obtaining the rights of the firstborn son.

There are stories that can only be found in the bible, and this is one of them. If the 3 little pigs included a part where one of the piglets flew an F-35 Lightning II to get rid of the wolf, that would have doomed the entire fable. Yet it would have worked wonders if it was in the bible. Consider the biblical undertaker gimmick that fills the church’s coffers: a “dead man” with mystical powers, dressed in a qumbaz over his qamis, yapping about the end of the world, and walking on water. We are in the range of normal things we can see every day. In this story, a newborn plays peekaboo during delivery, and that should give credence to an already inane story about murder, degradation of women and prostitution. The most outlandish crap ever devised can be found in the bible, the greatest story ever sold.

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