There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Among them:
If you get a rise from nonsense, look no further than the holy bible, a book so good that a few idiots decided to violate the US Constitution by displaying it in the halls of public buildings. There are stories so stupid that they can only be found in the bible.
Matthew 21:22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.
All things, whatsoever, you shall receive. I want only one thing: make the Earth idiot free. That should take care of all the problems we caused.