There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Among them:
The study of inconsistencies in the Bible has a long history. In the 17th century, Spinoza considered the Bible to be “a book rich in contradictions.” In the 18th century, Thomas Paine in “The Age of Reason” compiled many of the Bible’s self-contradictions. And in 1860, William Henry Burr produced a list of 144 self-contradictions in the Bible. This is an updated list of over 712 inconsistencies in the Bible.
Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
God makes the animals and parades them before Adam to see if any would give him a hard-on. But none seems to have what it takes to raise his interest; although it was a close call for the sheep. After making the animals, God delegated the naming to Adam; which was the longest job in history for one employee. Did Adam take coffee and cigarettes breaks?