The blood of Jesus

When it comes to the fairy in charge of the salvation of their souls, Christians fully support the New Testament and the worship of Jesus; but don’t seem to be too fond anymore of the previous messed up God of the Old Testament. From his biblical confession, the antiquated vinegarish fairy, aka Christian God, defined himself as a cunning, thieving, unremorseful criminal bully, with a temper always flaring like a pack of hemorrhoids, a bad attitude towards babies, children, women, men and trees; he smites the weak and runs away from the strong.

That became too much even for his followers, as a gentler God would be like using honey to catch more flies. So along came a new savior to replace the retiring old fart. This passing of the torch has been a religious tradition since Osiris, and later, when Zeus passed the torch on Mount Olympus.

Unlike his father who spends all his money and begs for more at every service, Jesus saves. But, with a new savior, comes a new set of rules, a new covenant. Now, a soul can only be saved by the blood of Jesus, meaning that everyone who came to this planet or elsewhere, before the “death” of Jesus, is shit out of luck. Without his blood, no one, not even his father, can get into heaven. Jesus has the only key to the pearly gates, and he is not sharing, unless someone bathes in his blood or drinks it. Luckily, churches around the world have enough buckets full of his blood, so every single person willing to believe that crap, can get a glass full.

God the father is fast becoming a mirage, a bad joke, while Satan retains all his attributes.

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