Biblical stupidity 2488

There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Many biblical books were deemed so stupid that 1800 imbeciles decided to ban them from the approved bible, in 325AD. This is the Protevangelion, by James the Lesser, cousin and brother of Jesus.

CHAP. X.
1 Joseph returns from building houses, finds the Virgin grown big, being six months’ gone with child, 2 is jealous and troubled, 8 reproaches her, 10 she affirms her innocence, 13 he leaves her, 16 determines to dismiss her privately, 17 is warned in a dream that Mary is with child by the Holy Ghost, 20 and glorifies God who hath shewn him such favour.
AND when her sixth month was come, Joseph returned from his building houses abroad, which was his trade, and entering into the house, found the Virgin grown big:
2 Then smiting upon his face, he said, With what face can I look up to the Lord my God? or, what shall I say concerning this young woman?
3 For I received her a Virgin out of the temple of the Lord my God, and have not preserved her such!
4 Who has thus deceived me? Who has committed this evil in my house, and seducing the Virgin from me, hath defiled her?
5 Is not the history of Adam exactly accomplished in me?
6 For in the very instant of his glory, the serpent came and found Eve alone, and seduced her.
7 Just after the same manner it has happened to me.
8 Then Joseph arising from the ground, called her, and said, O thou who hast been so much favoured by God, why hast thou done this?
9 Why hast thou thus debased thy soul, who wast educated in the Holy of Holies, and received thy food from the hand of angels?
10 But she, with a flood of tears, replied, I am innocent, and have known no man.
11 Then said Joseph, How comes it to pass you are with child?
12 Mary answered, As the Lord my God liveth, I know not by what means.
13 Then Joseph was exceedingly afraid, and went away from her, considering what he should do with her; and he thus reasoned with himself:
14 If I conceal her crime, I shall be found guilty by the law of the Lord;
15 And if I discover her to the children of Israel, I fear, lest she being with child by an angel, I shall be found to betray the life of an innocent person:
16 What therefore shall I do? I will privately dismiss her.
17 Then the night was come upon him, when behold an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream, and said,
18 Be not afraid to take that young woman, for that which is within her is of the Holy Ghost; .
19 And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name Jesus, for he shall save his people from their sins.
20 Then Joseph arose from his sleep, and glorified the God of Israel, who had shown him such favour, and preserved the Virgin.

Here is another great Christian family value. Joseph comes home after 6 months on the road, working in construction, to find out that his wife has been busy herself. Mary was a part-time seamstress by trade, and a full-time whore. This is the word used by Joseph, when he found his pregnant wife. That was omitted from the above text.

Virginity, perhaps on account of its rarity in those days among women of a marriageable age, had always a halo of sanctity cast over it by barbaric and semi-civilized tribes. Even in civilized Rome itself the Vestal Virgins were looked upon as peculiarly sacred.

In many other countries besides Egypt, similar stories of the virgin birth of gods were told.

Attis, the Phrygian god, was said to be the son of the virgin Nana, who conceived him by putting a ripe almond or pomegranate in her bosom.

The Grecian God Dionysos was said, in one version of the myth concerning him, to be the son of Zeus out of the virgin goddess Persephone. In another version he was said to be the miraculously begotten son of Zeus out of the mortal woman Semele. According to this story he was taken from his mother’s womb before the full period of gestation had expired, and completed his embryonic life in Zeus’s thigh. As a result, Dionysos was considered to be half human and half divine, born of a woman and also of a god.

His myth, which was current long before the Christian era, is a remarkable example of the kind of story which could be, and was, invented about a man-god. He was said to have been persecuted by Pentheus, King of Thebes (the home of his mother); to have been rejected in his own country; and, when bound, to have asserted that his father, God, would set him free whenever he chose to appeal to him. He disappears from earth, but re-appears as a light shining more brightly than the sun, and speaks to his trembling disciples; and he subsequently visits Hades. The story of his birth is alluded to, and the story of his persecution related, in The Bacchae, which Euripides wrote about 410 B.C. when the myth was already very old and very well known.

Jason, who was slain by Zeus, was said to have been another son of the virgin Persephone, and to have had no father, either human or divine.

Perseus was also said to have been born of a virgin; and it is this story which Justin Martyr, the second-century Christian “Father of the Church”, stigmatizes as an invention of the Devil, who, knowing that the Messiah would subsequently be born of a virgin, counterfeited the miracle before it really took place.

Today, the circumstances surrounding the pregnancy of the virgin Mary are easier to understand. As I explained in my books, a similar occurrence can be found when many nuns, who devoted their lives to the “service of the Lord,” find themselves pregnant, and the babies, born to these nuns, are murdered, usually by mother superior. The nuns are raped during the “ceremony from white to black veil” when they are “consecrated” as brides of the church. They submit themselves and are raped by horny priests with the permission of mother superior.

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