Biblical stupidity 2493

There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Many biblical books were deemed so stupid that 1800 imbeciles decided to ban them from the approved bible, in 325AD. This is the Protevangelion, by James the Lesser, cousin and brother of Jesus.

CHAP. XV.
1 Wise men come from the east. 3. Herod alarmed; 8 desires them if they find the child, to bring him word. 10 They visit the cave, and offer the child their treasure, 11 and being warned in a dream, do not return to Herod, but go home another way.
THEN Joseph was preparing to go away, because there arose a great disorder in Bethlehem by the coming of some wise men from the east,
2 Who said, Where is the king of the Jews born? For we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him.
3 When Herod heard this, he was exceedingly troubled, and sent messengers to the wise men, and to the priests, and inquired of them in the town-hall,
4 And said unto them, Where have you it written concerning Christ the king, or where should he be born?
5 Then they say unto him, In Bethlehem of Judæa; for thus it is written: And thou Bethlehem in the land of Judah, art not the least among the princes of Judah, for out of thee shall come a ruler, who shall rule my people Israel.
6 And having sent away the chief priests, he inquired of the men in the town-hall, and said unto them, What sign was it ye saw concerning the king that is born?
7 They answered him, We saw an extraordinary large star shining among the stars of heaven, and so out-shined all the other stars, as that they became not visible, and we knew thereby that a great king was born in Israel, and therefore we are come to worship him.
8 Then said Herod to them, Go and make diligent inquiry; and if ye find the child, bring me word again, that I may come and worship him also.
9 So the wise men went forth, and behold, the star which they saw in the east went before them, till it came and stood over the cave where the young child was with Mary his mother
10 Then they brought forth oat of their treasures, and offered unto him gold and frankincense, and myrrh.
11 And being warned in a dream by an angel, that they should not return to Herod through Judæa, they departed into their own country by another way.

In the Catholic religion, the holy Bible is composed of 73 books. These are divided between the Old Testament and the New Testament. Only the Old Testament consists of 46 books. The new testament is made up of the remaining 27 books.

The Protestant Bibles have 66 books, 7 less than the Catholic Bibles. This discrepancy is due to the fact that the Protestant Bibles do not include the following seven books: Tobias, Judith, 1 Maccabees, 2 Maccabees, Wisdom, Ecclesiastics and Baruch.

In the entire bible, 3 books, Protevangelion and only two ( Matthew and Luke) of the four gospels, discuss Jesus’s birth. And these three didn’t get the same memo. James, brother and cousin of Jesus, said he was born in a cave; Luke placed him in a manger while Matthew claimed Jesus was born in a cozy house. Jesus is not the first buttermilk complexed white man with a frequent liar program.

No wise men came from the East. How small was star which stood over the cave? And Matthew’s story of Herod being told that one who would be “King of the Jews” had been born, and of the consequent massacre of the innocents, also corresponds with Buddhist legend.

The name Jesus occurs only seven times in the entire bible, Christ only four times, and Jesus Christ only twice! James, Matthew and Luke contradicted each other in such critical details as the genealogy of Jesus, his place and manner of birth, etc… the gospel of Luke takes up 43 pages in the New English Bible, the gospel of Mark occupies only 25 pages – a mere 58% as much material.

We can safely skip all this nonsense and absurdities as Jesus never existed.

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