Biblical stupidity 2536

There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Many biblical books were deemed so stupid that 1800 imbeciles decided to ban them from the approved bible, in 325AD. Next comes The GOSPEL of NICODEMUS, formerly called the ACTS of PONTIUS PILATE. (Sit tight, hang on, we are about to discover some major BS.)

CHAP. VIII.
1 Miraculous appearance at his death. 10 The Jews say the eclipse was natural. 12 Joseph of Arimathæa embalms Christ’s body and buries it.

AND it was about the sixth hour, and darkness was upon the face of the whole earth until the ninth hour.
2 And while the sun was eclipsed, behold the vail of the temple was rent from the top to the bottom; and the rocks also were rent, and the graves opened, and many bodies of saints, which slept, arose.
3 And about the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, Hely, Hely, lama zabacthani? which being interpreted, is, My God, My God, why hast thou forsaken me?
4 And after these things, Jesus said, Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit; and having said this, he gave up the ghost.
5 But when the centurion saw that Jesus thus crying out gave up the ghost, he glorified God, and said, Of a truth this was a just man.
6 And all the people who stood by, were exceedingly troubled at the sight; and reflecting upon what had passed, smote upon their breasts, and then returned to the city of Jerusalem.
7 The centurion went to the governor, and related to him all that had passed;
8 And when he had heard all these things, he was exceeding sorrowful;
9 And calling the Jews together, said to them, Have ye seen the miracle of the sun’s eclipse, and the other things which came to pass, while Jesus was dying?
10 Which when the Jews heard, they answered to the governor, The eclipse of the sun happened according to its usual custom.
11 But all those who were the acquaintance of Christ, stood at a distance, as did the women who had followed Jesus from Galilee, observing all these things.
12 And behold a certain man of Arimathæa, named Joseph, who also was a disciple of Jesus, but not openly so, for fear of the Jews, came to the governor, and entreated the governor that he would give him leave to take away the body of Jesus from the cross.
13 And the governor gave him leave.
14 And Nicodemus came, bringing with him a mixture of myrrh and aloes about a hundred pound weight; and they took down Jesus from the cross with tears, and bound him with linen cloths with spices, according to the custom of burying among the Jews,
15 And placed him in a new tomb, which Joseph had built, and caused to be cut out of a rock, in which never any man had been put; and they rolled a great stone to the door of the sepulchre.

More BS. On the cross, Jesus calls to his father who is also himself. Leave it to a bunch of morons to steal tales from other cultures and not know how or be able to use them correctly. Folklore has nothing to do with facts.

Let’s assume that Jesus died on the cross; how great was his “sacrifice” when he knew that, in a few hours, he would be back in heaven?

“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”
― Epicurus

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