There are 7427 blatant absurdities in the bible. Many biblical books were deemed so stupid that 1800 imbeciles decided to ban them from the approved bible, in 325AD. Next comes The FIRST EPISTLE of CLEMENT to the CORINTHIANS. (Sit tight, hang on, we are about to discover some major BS.)
Clement was a disciple of Peter, and afterwards Bishop of Rome. The authenticity of this Epistle of St. Clement has been questioned, as he introduced the fabulous story of the phœnix’s revival from its own ashes (motif B32). One must entertain if St. Clement really believed that there was such a bird, and that it did revive out of the cinders of the body after burning. Then he most likely believed in a talking snake, talking ass, Jesus walking on water, Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and monsters under his bed.
He exhorts them to obedience, from the consideration of the goodness of God, and of his presence in every place.
TAKE heed, beloved, that his many blessings be not to us to condemnation; except we shall walk worthy of him, doing with one consent what is good and pleasing in his sight.
2 The spirit of the Lord is a candle, searching out the inward of the belly.
3 Let us therefore consider how near he is to us; and how that none of our thoughts, or reasonings which we frame with in ourselves, are hid from him.
4 It is therefore just that we should not forsake our rank, by doing contrary to his will.
5 Let us choose to offend a few foolish and inconsiderate men, lifted up and glorying in their own pride, rather than God.
6 Let us reverence our Lord Jesus Christ whose blood was given for us.
7 Let us honour those who are set over us; let us respect the aged that are amongst us; and let us instruct the younger men, in the discipline and fear of the LORD.
8 Our wives let us direct to do that which is good.
9 Let them show forth a lovely habit of purity in all their conversation; with a sincere affection of meekness.
10 Let the government of their tongues be made manifest by their silence.
11 Let their charity be without respect of persons alike towards all such as religiously fear God.
12 Let your children be bred up in the instruction of Christ:
13 And especially let them learn how great a power humility has with God; how much a pure and holy charity avails with him; how excellent and great his fear is; and how it will save all such as turn to him with holiness in a pure mind.
14 For he is the searcher of the thoughts and counsels of the heart; whose breath is in us, and when he pleases he can take it from us.